PART I : The complex theories of relationships

I’m not so sure what I should name this article.

Ladies, gents, Morning,

I always do my best to avoid speaking about relationships even with my close friends, both love wise and friendship wise but I feel like some people need few reminders on certain things, or simply just basic facts.

Keep in mind that all this is still according to me and that it doesn’t mean that it is the absolute truth. I’m going to section this into two distinct parts so that no confusions are being made.

Everything that is being said here is all according to my personal observations and experiences.

Background information :

About 20 years, 5 countries, 9 schools and a lot of friends and acquaintances later, this is how I feel about relationships ..

I personally “click” better with boys, men, males, whatever you want to call it, but for a reason I just feel better with them. There is just less stress. Us ladies get jealous over anything, we find issues where there are none and we just rather talk to everyone but the one person concerned, when we have an issue. I know it’s weird.

I was a tomboy for a long time, until I was something like 14, then my mum slapped some sense into me and things just switched up.

It’s not even until recently that I started being interested in make up. I just never understood why someone would spend so much money into something like make up but things are different now.

At least from the outside …

From the inside I still understand men better than most women do and that takes part in me enjoying their company more then women’s own. No offense

I’ve tried having close “girlfriends” but something always happened. They always ended up drifting apart from me for some reason. I thought maybe I was the issue but I never had that kind of problem with males though.

I’m absolutely not the “show off” type, especially when I’m with a girl because you really don’t know what they are really thinking and if there is something I absolutely hate … it’s being judged. Especially when you know very little about me, or just what I allow you to know.

Most girls growing up find an “issue” on their body. Please tell me if I’m wrong, but this is something that I’ve witnessed. They either find and “issue” with their “brest”, their bum bums, their nose, their eyes being too close or too wide apart, they don’t have thigh gaps, they are too dark, too fair, they are too fat or too skinny, there is always something.

As for me, being a regular girl,  I had my own issue too.

I always found myself too tall. I was always the tallest, both amongst boys and girls. I would literally always stand out. I was even told that I walk like I am going to beat up someone Hahah, or even that I look super mean (After my tom boys days … some behaviour never left my body).

All this always made me laugh but it didn’t help me deal with my height issues.

Today I’m 6ft1 (1m85) and I really don’t care anymore. I never thought people would envy my height to the point of disliking me.

If you notice, each time I mentioned the word “issue”it was in quotation mark, because all these things are not issues. They just seem like they are to us but they truly aren’t. This is mostly what I’ve witnessed with women. Growing up I also realised that things become different and harder to deal with when you are into a long distance friendship with girls. They just don’t put as much effort as boys to stay in touch. I always felt like I was replaceable. And that’s probably the worse feeling a friend could give you.

There are also issues being friends with boys but I rather deal with them. Friendship often turns into something else with men. Spending time with a person, “chilling”, talking, getting to know each other. This creates a connection. I believe best lovers are also best friends. Most boys I’ve been close friends too ended up developing feelings for me and either you choose to pursue the friendship and to let it become “love”ship or not, your relationship will never be the same.

You realise that weather you date or not, it’s hard to be friends with someone that has feelings for you but that you simply consider as a friend, or simply to end up dating and eventually ruining a great friendship when the love story is over.

This is also a serious obstacle to having male friends. You cannot spend time with a person from the opposite sex everyday, confide in them, talk about your dreams, goals and aspirations, share the same vision and values and not fall for them; or expect them to fall for you. At least, so I believe …


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